The God Who Works With Our Uncertain Faith
I typed the words “God will work it out” into the search bar on my phone — the title of a song I desperately needed to hear but didn’t fully believe.
It had been a struggle for the past few months as difficulties outside of my control continued to mount in my life. I felt like a ping-pong ball, tossed back and forth by what appeared to be unfair and impossible challenges: aging parents, marriage woes, and internal issues in me.
I was overwhelmed and determined to drown out the doubt and sadness with the words I needed to repeat in my brain: “God will work it out.”
If I could hear those words enough, maybe, just maybe, I would believe them. I popped in my earbuds and rested my head on the pillow. As the song played and then repeated over and over, the tears slowly slid down my face. I eventually cried myself to sleep.
The lyrics prompted me to reflect on my past experiences with God. As I thought about the difficult circumstances I had already faced with Him, I found myself mustering up the courage to believe God would do the same again. But the words of the song were no match for the weight of my worry.
When I woke up, there had been no visible change in my situation or my faith. I had the same doubts in God as I had gone to bed with. The circumstances I was facing seemed much larger than God’s ability to resolve them on my behalf. My faith felt so uncertain.
This is where a desperate father found himself in the book of Mark.
